JENNIFER LINDSAY

jennifer lindsay (canada/the republic of ireland) is a tkaronto based artist-researcher working in theatre, video, ceramics, and sound. spanning art and neuro health sciences, her practice is informed by memoirs of the body, language disfluency, and crip time.

PROJECTS

GLOSSARY

STUDIO

REMEMBER TO FORGET

Remember to Forget (II), 2011 © Susan Hiller

ONLINE
nov 2020 - august 2023

this online research project and public call for submission is driven by the question:

what does memory sound like?

anomia is an experience of delayed language recall, not an experience of memory loss. when i first became aware of my anomia from a brain injury, i mistakenly thought i was experiencing memory loss and became obsessed with trying to improve it. despite my neurologist correcting my understanding of what i was experiencing, the habits i developed to improve my memory proved difficult to break.

it was in cabinet magazine issue 42, forgetting, where i encountered a postcard by susan hiller entitled remember to forget. it felt like a gift. the imagery, depicting an old-fashioned ritual of remembering, and the words - contradicting and embracing the ritual at the same time. the contradiction offered me relief. it also planted seeds for my desire to change my relationship to time and memory in connection to my anomia.

my encounter with susan hiller’s postcard was a point of departure in my work on brain injury and communication disfluency. it sparked this online research project and public call for submission, and established the foundations of SPEAK, MEMORY! 26 OR LESS, and my sound work in DRAWING A BLANK.

jennifer lindsay’s ct scans

in preparaton for spring 2021 ceramic studio hours, i spent the winter compiling a list of words and phrases in relation to anomia, word-finding finding techniques, and memory phenomena. my intention was to press these words and phrases into clay tablets to continue my practice of making modern-day cuneiforms. at the same time, in the throes of the pandemic, i felt lonely, and wanted to hear voices that weren’t mine or my partner’s. i decided to put out an online international call for submissions under the borrowed name, REMEMBER TO FORGET, where participants were invited to submit a recording by answering the research question, what does memory sound like? and/or reading from the script below:

selection of words and phrases

i can't remember
i forgot
i am drawing a blank
it doesn't come to mind
i am trying to find the word
vaguely
i don't know
and you never forget where you are
forget it
before i forget
refresh my memory
if my memory serves me correctly
this will jog my memory
flashbulb memory
memory palace

the recordings i received ranged from pragmatic paced readings to a singular word repeated numerous times, to great voices of presence. some folks chose to announce themselves, while others left prank calls. the voices ranged from shy, to imperceptible, to overbearing, revealing personal happenings in the background. the sound of a filing cabinet tumbling down a flight of stairs for example.

as I listened, i felt like i had found new friends. it was the pandemic okay? what I didn’t expect, but what seems obvious to me now, was to be pulled into what was happening in between the words: pauses, fumbles, mispronunciations, stammering, stuttering, and unknown sounds. newfound pandemic friendship aside, i felt seen. as someone who experiences anomia from brain injury, i live between words most of the time.

it is fair to say that i got too close and needed to insert some objectivity back into the project. cut to returning to uni to study social studies of neuroscience, and some time spent in a sound production studio with my dear friend and collaborator naveed ahmed some time later, my art practice and research adopted a more symmetrical appoach: less about me, and more about the possibilities of communication disfluency in community.

to learn about the projects that emerged from this research project and public call for submissions, visit SPEAK, MEMORY! 26 OR LESS, and DRAWING A BLANK. to listen to text-based soundscapes co-created with naveed ahmed, click on the audio players below.

many thanks to the participants for their contributions, prashant gopal for the burner app recommendation, and naveed ahmed for being a generous long-time collaborator.

jennifer lindsay’s ct scans

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